Joshua Harris and the Rest of Us

When I was in high school, a lot of people I knew read the Joshua Harris book I Kissed Dating Goodbye. It was the same era of James Dobson's Life on the Edge. Who can forget about halfway through the book when Dobson lists his “12 steps to intimacy” in all caps. Stage 1: EYE TO EYE; stage 6: HAND TO WAIST; and stage 10 — giggle-whispered by high schoolers from coast to coast — MOUTH TO BREAST. 

I never read the Harris book, I didn't go to daddy daughter dances or wear a promise ring. For whatever reason, my family's interaction with evangelicalism was more closely connected to dinner table talks about whether or not you could "lose your salvation" or “had to be baptized to be saved.” We circled less around promiscuity and more around sloppy theological uncertainty.

That said, my mind is stuck on the recent Harris Instagram post where the author and former pastor shares that he no longer identifies as a Christian. It's a familiar progression, from conservative pastor, to progressive student, to a declarer of independence from the church. This journey is personal for Harris: I’m not interested in questioning his choices and am not being dismissive of his experience. But, if like me, you don’t subscribe to the vision of Christianity Harris perpetuated in his Kissed Dating era, it makes sense that it still takes a toll whenever we hear these headlines.

I’m less interested in his individual beliefs than in how his new post-Christian experience influences us corporately and culturally. That particular Instragram post had swift, international headline reach (and apparently some wild comments, which I skimmed and quickly got the gist.)

I don’t think media is latching on because of Harris in particular, but because of what he represents culturally. It’s classic, the story of a unquestioning believer-turned-agnostic. And it gets clicks.

The headline in The Guardian reads: “Author of Christian relationship guide says he has lost his faith.” The NY Post writes: “Christian guru says he’s getting divorced, denounces faith.” Jezebel writes a headline that sounds more like it should be from CBN: “Purity Culture Icon Joshua Harris Says That Premarital Dating Is Fine, Now That He’s Getting Divorced.” There are many more. 

For much of the secular space, the Harris announcement is a quick cocktail party convo, something you might mention in passing to your person while you’re brushing your teeth before bed. If I wasn't a Christian, here's how I'd think about this news: “Well, that makes sense. A reasonable person, a thinking person, would come to this conclusion eventually.”

When you're a public person you have power, and what you say bears influence. And a lot of us are bummed that, here we go again, another Christian in the public space pivots. The same ripples were felt after Dave Bazan walked away from Christianity, Derek Webb, that Gunger guy. 

But I want to tell you that there are many of us here, not just treading water but blooming. Here's what that looks like: choosing to remain as people of faith and bear that banner in spite of doubt. We hold doubt in one hand as a normal part of faith. We hold hope in God’s goodness in the other.

Regardless of how in the evanescent barrage of news headlines it can be easy to experience discouragement as a Christian, in reality if the Biblical story is true there’s a promise that the church will survive, bear witness on behalf of the poor, and celebrate all things being made right someday.

There are reasonable, thinking, political, passionate people of faith that are pushing forward in spite of the heavy weight of loss, the brokenness of the church, and the guilt by association in 2019 America.

We're here, and we'll be here, changing and growing but really rooted in the fact that we're messed up but made new over and over by grace. And here in our on-the-daily weaknesses, where God's power can be made perfect.

Through the Holy Spirit, God is reconciling. God is healing. God is moving through the ordinary work of Christians and gifting us with an imagination of all we can do together. Of renewal. If that's you, take courage, be strong of heart. You’re not alone.